Posted by nux at 10:58PM, 11/Aug/10.
Blog Home | Profile

WOMEN'S ADS:

40-ish - 49

Adventurous - Slept with everyone

Athletic - No tits

Average looking - Barge arse

Beautiful - Pathological liar

Contagious Smile - Does a lot of pills

Emotionally secure - On medication

Feminist - Fat

Free spirit - Junkie

Friendship first - Formerly a slut

Fun - Annoying

New Age - Body hair in the wrong places

Open-minded - Desperate

Outgoing - Loud and Embarrassing

Passionate - Sloppy drunk

Professional - Bitch

Average - Fat

Voluptuous - Very Fat

Large frame - Hugely Fat

Wants Soul mate - Stalker

MEN'S ADS:

40-ish - 52 and looking for 25-yr-old

Athletic - Watches a lot of sports on TV

Average guy - Has a head like a robbers dog, but has a friendly nature.

Educated - Will patronize the hell out of you

Free Spirit - Willing to bang your sister and your mother.

Friendship first - You're dumped if you dont put out on 2nd date - no later !

Fun - Pisshead.

Good looking - Arrogant

Very good looking - Happy to have sex with himself if you dont put out.

Honest - Pathological Liar

Huggable - Overweight, more body hair than a Yetti

Likes to cuddle - Insecure mama's boy

Mature - Older than your father

Open-minded - Back door bandit.

Physically fit - Has the ability to run away if neccessary

Sensitive - Cries at chick flicks

Spiritual - Got laid in a cemetery once

Stable - Arrested for stalking, but not convicted