Online Dating Safety - PLEASE READ !
In light of a recent event where someone had a member show up at their place of work, uninvited, i thought i would at least TRY to get more people to educate themselves on online safety. The site has some extremely good advice, but not many people seem to read it - everyone is too busy trying to make connections i guess.
I wish everyone would read the advice below, and PLEASE encourage others (especially newbies) to read it too. Of course, as mentioned in the other blog that spoke of this incident said, even if this is a 1 in 1,000 incident, it's worth taking precautions/educating yourself to be protected, you cant be too careful.
- Always trust your instinct, after all it has got you this far in life already
- Take your time and view plenty of personal ads first
- Do not publish your phone number or email address in personal ads
- Don't take everything at face value
- Do ask lots of questions when chatting
- Ensure you feel comfortable at all times whoever you are chatting with
- If someone is abusive to you, block them straight away
- Don't provide your home or work address to anyone you have not met
- Before agreeing to a date, check that you know as much as possible
- Don't allow yourself to be talked into anything, whatsoever! You are the one in charge
Also consider the following:
- Take your time to get to know someone. Don't be rushed
- A patient person will be happy to wait until you are ready to meet
- Make sure you see plenty of photos if possible of the person you make friends with
- Ask your date to leave a message in your voicemail box before hand if possible
- Chat on the phone for a while before arranging a date, get to know each other (skype or msn or some form of online messenger is even better, because you can block the person if things get weird)
- Always meet in a public place that is well known and convenient to you
- Always tell a good friend where you are going, and who you are meeting
- If possible phone your friend during the date to confirm all is fine
And perhaps consider these points too:
- Always carry a cellular phone on a date if you have one
- Lunchtimes are good for dating, convenient, and they have a time limit
- Always make your own travel arrangements on a date initially
- Do not accept a lift home on the first date or reveal your address
- If travelling far, organize your own accommodation and confirm it
- Ensure you have as much information about your date as possible
- Keep your first date to a time limit so that you have an "exit" point
- Don't feel you owe it to someone to meet them, you do not!
Please encourage others to either read this blog, or pass on this link:
http://www.flingfinder.com.au/safety.shtml
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(Private Profile) - 10 Jun, 12
-I was just talking to the person who had this uninvited guest turn up at her work. It came as a shock to me, as she is a close personal friend of mine and I didn't know it was her this happened to… She told me the full story.. On top of what Nux said, this incident was far from spontaneous. It involved timing, deception, calculation and a lot of research.. It is truly worrying that there are people on this site, not only capable of this type of stalking, but who are willing and capable of this type of obsessive harassment.. PLEASE PLEASE PLEASE take Nux's advice and read and follow the points he has outlines… Times have changed and you really must be careful..
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(Private Profile) - 09 Jun, 12
-This is a great blog and will undoubtedly help a lot of people on this site. But I have a question...internet dating has been around for a long time now and most people should already know this stuff. Who gives out their personal details to someone they don't know very well? Common sense plays a big role.
But what concerns me is the number of people who go out of their way to find out personal details from members here under false pretences (by befriending them) and then either use the information against them, or use it to manipulate or just to downright trick them!
There are some very damaged people in the world!
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nux (FF Host) - 10 Jun, 12
Brunswick Heads, NSW, AUWell said, Mr Cool of the 50z variety.
756 Comments - 117 Blog Posts
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nux (FF Host) - 08 Jun, 12
Brunswick Heads, NSW, AU"the instructions are best read before something goes wrong !"
Yep, i'm going to include the link in my welcome message, which is sent to every new member :)756 Comments - 117 Blog Posts
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(Private Profile) - 08 Jun, 12
-Nux,
Interesting how the points you just mentioned, are taken verbatim from the "Dating Safety" tab at the very top right of the FlingFinder, but some people are only acknowledging them now because you put them here in your blog. - Maybe you should mention this to oodium, as obviously either nobody can find them or the little white text which says "Dating Safety" is too small and hidden for anyone to click on it. I recon you should make this particular blog, permanent and at the top of the blog list… Just a thought..
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nux (FF Host) - 08 Jun, 12
Brunswick Heads, NSW, AUAgreed, it needs to be more prominant. In the meantime though, hopefully the community can help eachother out and direct eachother (especially newbies)to the link included in the blog :)
I send every new member a welcome message, perhaps i'll include the link in that.756 Comments - 117 Blog Posts
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(Private Profile) - 08 Jun, 12
-I have read these when I first joined fling....................bu was commenting as its good to be reminded from time to time.............perhaps a message sent to all members periodically would be a good idea as a 'refresher'
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(Private Profile) - 10 Jun, 12
-In FF 2 there will be an expanded section on both dating safety and avoiding scams, and links to these at the bottom of every message received.
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A stalker can spend a tremendous lot of time to find information of his/hers victim. You cannot imagine...
With Internet you leave traces very often without knowing it. I have for example got two invitations to social networks by people here. People I have chatted with on MSN. Then they used asliases but at the social networks I was invited to they used their true identities. I do not think anyone knew invitations was sent to all addresses they had in their address book. So you can easily blow your anonymous cover.
Take care all out there and never leave any footprints to anyone but those you can trust.