What women want (on FF)(bump)
G'day,
Sometimes i see male members gettting discouraged by not getting any "action" as they call it, and they have negative comments to say about the site because they are not having any luck with the ladies. I believe most of these guys have the wrong aproach, most seem to think "we're all here to hook up, so whats the problem?". I also see women getting disgusted with guys and their "direct" aproach.
I hope this blog will serve 2 purposes:
1) the ladies can express themselves (vent) on what they expect from a bloke to get their attention, and what turns them off.
2) Guys, you can read and pick up some tips.
I'll start by adding my personal view on what might be a good tip: Dudes, dont go into chat and imediately start whispering chicks with "hello, have you got a cam". Have some tact, try having a bit of a conversation with members before making any suggestion of sex, or even camming. These women might indeed be interested in a fling, but MOST of them will be turned off by guys who have only one thing on their mind - their dicks. If you are in chat, then join the general topic of conversation, the women will take much more notice of you if you're not afraid to chat in the public forum - they will think you're a friendly kind of bloke. When you start whispering or inviting to msn right away its considered rude (by most people). You wouldnt walk up to a woman in a bar who's chatting to a group of people and try to drag them away from the group or you might end up with a kick in the balls from the women and a black eye from the blokes - this is no different.
So in short, be friendly and respectful - the more personal and intimate chat will follow - and from there, a far greater chance of hooking up.
Ok ladies, have at it, let the fellas (and even other women) know what would get your attention :)
Oh, and ladies, if you see a guy complaining in chat - direct them to this blog :)
If you get inbox messages from blokes who contradict "what you want", copy and paste the following code into a reply to their message:
1a href="/blogs/nux/what_women_want.shtml"2 click here 1/a2 and have a read.
But change the 1's to open arrow brackets < and the 2's to closed arrow brackets >
Tick the little box "save as template" and give it a name before you hit "send" then you can select the template whenever you want to direct people to this blog, to learn about what women want :)
Give it a try !
Here's some screenshots to show you how:
First hit reply, then do this....
Then hit SEND, they will recieve a message that looks like this:
And next time you want to reply a message, you just hit reply, then select the saved template, like this:
As you can see the code will load automatically, and you can then just hit SEND :)
Here's some other blogs you might enjoy :)
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(Private Profile) - 29 Jan, 15
-Well written and makes perfect sense. Decency and respect go a long way.
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(Private Profile) - 15 Jan, 13
-Hi there I agree with the majority 95% I really do the less bad eggs the better the omlette! I do have to agree with hawny111 abit as I have also been frustrated on other sites (hopefully not this one) about people I message in a perfectly polite way to not only not reply but even fail to look at MY profile? I consider my self to be average looking but not ugly enough to scare away a Banshee so I just don't really get it sometimes.
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tank120 - 28 Dec, 12
Wodonga, VIC, AUHi Nux,
thanks for the heads up.Don't really know what I'm looking for .......so I won't make a complete moron of my visit in any chat room,1 Comment - 0 Blog Posts
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jaykx - 10 Oct, 12
Caravonica, QLD, AUoooook so how is this any different to the nightclubs pubs coffee shops you know the real world where women always have the upper hand as they will be happy to sit back an watch men compete for their attention an then they will judge a man for what he calls himself eg; big boy,stud, well hung donkey boy or what ever have you women ever thought for just once that the guy has picked this name to give himself a little conferdance because in the real world he was polite, kind well mannered an respectful towards all women as he should. but to his disapointemt was never considered because he was oh i dont know maybe a little over wait or lacked conferdence or just didnt know how to talk to a woman so then someone tells him he just might get a chance to finally find some female contact on this web site but guess what this site is no different. all this site do's is give women a compressed list of thousands of possible horny men an to sit back an pick one that complements her enough to get her to separate from her cloths. no disrespect but i thought as he did that this site was for like minded women who wanted contact with men for sex or to find a friend that could lead to something more so as i started this convo off how is this site any different from out there in the real world..... IT ISNT so thank you for the invite but im gonna have to decline this membership because if i wanted to run in a marathon i would have asked for a race number an an put on some runners.... p.s its a pitty that a great idea slowly sank down to reality
1 Comment - 0 Blog Posts
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Motormouth - 10 May, 12
Hamilton, NSW, AUthankyou nux for the heads up. it seems this site really is an open forum for meeting folk. i shall dive in headlong and maintain my optimism!
1 Comment - 0 Blog Posts
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(Private Profile) - 04 May, 12
-I am a newbie here, and I don't expect anything but I guess nux intro me here, I guess I say hi. :)
I am an Asian male and I do respect women of and race and age.
I would like to know about the girls here in wa and hope to expand to know some more friends.
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South Oz Male - 04 Jan, 12
Seacliff, SA, AUI always wondered if those guys that go into chatrooms saying 'anyone want to suck my dick' etc actually got any replies or were they just brainless idiots.
No Offence to the other brainless idiots that don't do that.1 Comment - 0 Blog Posts
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Tonyjp - 26 Nov, 11
Barnsley, NSW, AUthats why most relationships fail , u have to be respectful of the other person eh.
1 Comment - 0 Blog Posts
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(Private Profile) - 01 Nov, 11
-ok here goes
no photo - no answer
you have great tits - fail
you have not read any of my profile - fail
you are unable to have any elocution of the English language - fail
flirts - boringpositives
Hi, how are you...I like blah blah
or some random funny email that catches my intelligence
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(Private Profile) - 31 Oct, 11
-It is great reading all your comments and thanks Nux for your info, I've only just joined and consider myself a very respectful person, I have never used a site like this and this has opened my mind in so many ways. It is great to know so many people feel the same way too and you all have provided a lot of direction. Huge thumbs up!!
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(Private Profile) - 18 Aug, 11
-well this blg has been awesome help im only new here and just read the whole blog page its opened my mind up about the whole online dateing thing and wat women want on here which most comes without saying in the first place ie to actually talk to each other first haha well any way thanks nux for sending me this blog :) kudos brother
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(Private Profile) - 01 Jul, 11
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I don't mean to be rude but this whole topic seems like common sense to me, yet I still forced myself to read it all, it's good to hear other peoples opinions. I am open to new information at all times, that doesn't mean I will like it or believe it, but I will always listen. And even though being polite is obvious to me that doesn't mean I didn't learn anything. I probably won't be as annoyingly forward in the future...A turn off for me is profiles that I'm not able to 'get'. Things like no photos and really vague information about the personality is annoying. I like having a brief idea about who they are here for so I can work out if I want to add them or not. You can have lots of words, or very few words and still get a clear message across.
There are a lot of distorted value systems out there (I'm not excluding myself) because communication is rarly encouraged, only serving the economy is encouraged, and in the end we are products of our environment, victims of culture per se.
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(Private Profile) - 12 May, 11
-Softly...I think the gramma was supposed to go something like... "...but some of us believe, relationship or not, a connection always makes the meeting so much better." ...as in he was saying that the connection is important even if it's just a fling...? Is that right out4fun?
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(Private Profile) - 11 May, 11
-Apart from liking doofus' photo I would like to say this. I agree that respect will get you SO much further than ignorance or indifference. A bit of humour always goes down well. Surely it's nicer to be intimate with someone you like and know a little about... ? If not, I would suggest you maintain a non-speaking relationship with your hand. ;) TRUE!
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stronglibido - 11 Nov, 15
Crookwell, NSW, AUNever let your right hand know what your left hand is doing.
2 Comments - 0 Blog Posts
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(Private Profile) - 11 May, 11
-I believe this to be a typical 'male' comment. So is it 'not a connection' or 'a relationsip' that makes 'the meeting' better?
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screwpulous - 11 May, 11
Carseldine, QLD, AUWow, I find it amazing that the fellas even think that you can just go in like that..and ask straight-up. I thought it went without saying that you need to engage a lady mind to mind first...regardless of what is implied by the name of a web site! Surely even more than just a 'fling' would be the bonus of meeting someone here... would be lovely to go for a jog or even a movie with a new friend. Oh, well, more for the sensible guys....
1 Comment - 0 Blog Posts -
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(Private Profile) - 07 Feb, 11
-Also to me your choice of user name is important.
If your user name is something like big dick, tits, wet pussy or anything degrading, rude and stupid - you have made my mind up for me...
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(Private Profile) - 07 Feb, 11
-Some sign of intelligence - that would be nice.
I like it if I know someone has bothered to read at least some of my profile.
If you're too lazy to write full words and often use a z instead of an s - I don't think it's cool... I think it's pretty dumb.
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stronglibido - 11 Nov, 15
Crookwell, NSW, AUOne of my complaints too. Standard English is still the best kind to use. Abbreviations are not called for and brevity is not necessarily the soul of wit. Correct spelling is an indication of an adequate education and I still prefer a "zed" to a "zee."
2 Comments - 0 Blog Posts
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(Private Profile) - 04 Feb, 11
-hehehe clingy, you would think they would get the hint just by ur screenname aka heartbreaka!, that you dont want a relationship or anything full on, lol. Thats funny.
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(Private Profile) - 04 Feb, 11
-I could not have said it any better , i agree 100% with you Krysp :).
Also , thanx for the blog Nux :)summer
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Yaz_1983 - 09 Sep, 10
Miami, QLD, AUOMG Nux i couldnt have put it better myself. Just becuase we are on this site and looking for a flinger doesnt make us more less of a lady. You wouldnt go up to some girl in the street and say hey Sexy, show me your tits on cam... It doesnt work and probably never will.. I also dont understand if i havent spoken to you before why would i want to click on your cam and view your show.. talk to me first man and have a chat then maybe i might watch your show and actually enjoy it.. lol
48 Comments - 7 Blog Posts
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nux (FF Host) - 25 Aug, 10
Brunswick Heads, NSW, AUOi ! My rude bits aint that funny !
;)756 Comments - 117 Blog Posts
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(Private Profile) - 18 Jun, 10
-I like long foreplays ;-)
(giggling)Much to many guys stick their dick right into the girls face at first mail contact. This is true - it happens all the time. Mostly younger men. And it makes me wanna puke.
And then we have the other type who have a carbon copy of everybody elses introduction. "nice and average guy seeking contact with girl for non-string-attached intimacy"
Guys who not reading my profile is also a instant turn-off. To be one out of hundred of mails is not what a girl want.
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(Private Profile) - 13 Jun, 10
-for me personally, I love a bit of humour..........a small amount of telling me that I look good, goes down well too.
asking me to cam up and not reading my profile, doesn't work so well. I only cam for people who have the courtesy to also have a cam.....come on $50 in gaymart for friggs sake.
whispering to me 1st up, doesn't work either.
A hello, how are you will do, be funny, witty, not too horrid on the eye and we'll see what happens.
Women love to be loved-
nux (FF Host) - 13 Jun, 10
Brunswick Heads, NSW, AUYou can get cams on ebay for under $10 - postage included !
756 Comments - 117 Blog Posts -
(Private Profile) - 21 Apr, 12
-:) gaymart, haven't heard that one before. Laugh.
Is interesting to read all these comments as I'm a noob to this site myself. Haven't really tried the chat rooms properly yet and this is even my first blog reply, but it's funny to hear about other guys wanting to show random women their penis over the Internet. Call me old fashioned, but to any of those guys in mention who might be reading, internet or not, approaching most people, especially someone you don't know and offering to show them your dick is just freaky. I guess for some it's easy to forget that sites like these are merely proxies for communication between real human beings. Seems pretty easy, if you are interested in meeting women, then it makes sense to treat those people with some common courtesy and respect.
Anyway, just thought I'd throw in my two cents :)
Thanks for the original post Nux.
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(Private Profile) - 10 Jun, 10
-I totally agree with everyone and Nux you have been a brilliant help darl. I too have experienced the same thing also. Really even a guy picking up a hooker has to chat with her first so bear that in mind guys. We, ladies in FF, are all heaps of rungs up the ladder from a hooker so please treat us with the respect you would treat any stranger with, manners.
Manners will get you a lot of places in this world. It is all in your approach. Don't think that because you have not hooked up and been rejected by every female on the site that there is something wrong with the site. Take a look at the one common factor in it all and that is you. Would you talk to someone in the 3D world the way to speak to the ladies in chat. If the answer is no to that question then there is something wrong with your approach not the site or the ladies on the site.
If you treat us like the girl you have been dying to date then you will probably get the rewards. It's like anything in life if it is too easy you don't respect it or appreciate it either!!!!
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(Private Profile) - 09 Jun, 10
-I have seen this all too often. A newbie will enter the chatroom and systematically go through the list and seek out the women and either whisper to them, or send a targetted message to them asking them the same exact question: 'Wanna see me get off'....or some such shit!
Now, I know I am not speaking for all the women, but I can honestly say I am speaking for the majority of them when I say this: NO WE DO NOT!!
At the very least, say hello first!Last night, there was a guy like this in the room...he directed a message to me asking me if I wanted to see him beat off. I was polite and tactful and told him that he is not allowed to show nudity in the lobby, there are other rooms for that...he thanked me for the advice...but did it stop him from asking the same question to me and to the other ladies again? NO!!
When he was told by several members that they were not interested, he sent me a whisper stating that he thought this was a 'fling' site and he was expecting some action, and he didn't want to get to know the women, he just wanted the quick shag! I expressed to him that women need to at least chat to a potential shag and he said that he didn't want a relationship, so what was the point of chatting?
This man is only one of about a dozen that have chatted to me in much the same manner....As a member on this site, and as a woman, I can only state my opinion in this part...if I was going to hook up with someone, I'd want to at least know that they are not a psychotic serial killer...yet when tell these types of men that I don't even know them, so how can I be expected to hook up, their response usually is: ok what do you want to know about me?? Ha!!
For the men reading this, I have abit of advice....when you see a woman in chat whose profile you like, chat to her in the same manner you would chat to her if you met her in a bar, or at the library, or at the shopping centre!
The last thing women here want to feel like are cheap sluts, which is the way one newbie member made me feel last night!!-
(Private Profile) - 13 Jun, 10
-if we didn't want a bit of a chat we'd all (women) (a) only use vibes or (b) get our g/f to strap one on.
women need food for the brain too, stimulation here, usually leads to stimulation inbetween my legs.
boys that think they're just going to get a girl to open up, so to speak, its just not guna happen
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bawlesoffury - 26 Aug, 10
Ferntree Gully, VIC, AU... chat to her in the same manner you would chat to her if you met her in a bar, or at the library, or at the shopping centre... What? Not at all? Heh. I'm shy as... I joined to try and get some more human contact (and no not just actual contact, excuse my bad pun.) I don't have many women in my life and my mates are all settled. Problem for me is I haven't had much time to be involved in chat and such. But that's my problem.
Just putting it out there that I don't think I'll be sending any "wanna root" messages any time soon. I have to say this post is an excellent reminder that women deserve respect too. I just didn't realize till now (joking :P) But it's something that shouldn't need a reminder.(climbs back into hole)
6 Comments - 2 Blog Posts -
(Private Profile) - 03 Nov, 12
-So you're totally fine with any OTHER kind of serial killer then....? :P
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nux (FF Host) - 09 Jun, 10
Brunswick Heads, NSW, AUYou said it wayyyyyyyy better !
You're a bitch? cool, i'm in the market for a new (extra) one ;)756 Comments - 117 Blog Posts
Ayr, QLD, AU
very interesting.what can i say .respect women!